Cannotcannotcannot get the smell of upper GI bleed to go away. Even though it was 15hrs ago. Even after six handwashings and way too many hand sanitizing sessions and four alcohol scrubdowns of my stethoscope/BP cuff/penlight/pen/ENTIRE AMBULANCE/etc. and a scalding hot shower.

Sir, you scared the living daylights out of me. At the pre-breakfast just stumbled into my truck part of my day. As my partner put it, the whitest girl ever turned three shades whiter. Actually, you're still scaring the living daylights out of me. Not having the follow-up may be the worst part of this job. Small towns have crews that can wander into the local ER and ask about every patient they've transported. New York City has more than 70 hospitals. Chances of us visiting the same hospital twice in one shift = 0 to none, unless it's one of the big ones.

Maybe another shower will fix things. Because that's really the only thing I can fix. Because sir, I can clean up the mess and do my best keep your airway clear and drive as goddamn fast as physically possible, but I can't fix the problem. I can't stop the bleeding, but I can get you to good hands. And if you remember, please give your companion my infinite gratitude for calling us as soon as they realized they couldn't stop the nose bleed.

That call scared me shitless, but it could've been so much worse if they'd waited.

And I may take emergency nose bleed calls totally goddamn effing serious for the rest of my career.